Author Archives: Herons! The Blog

The Vagina Is Coming To Get You.

VAGINA.

VAGINA.  VAGINA.

VAGINA.  VAGINA.  VAGINA.

VAGINA.  VAGINA.  VAGINA.  VAGINA.

VAGINA.  VAGINA.  VAGINA.  VAGINA.  VAGINA.

VAGINA.  VAGINA.  VAGINA.  VAGINA.

VAGINA.  VAGINA.  VAGINA.

VAGINA.  VAGINA.

VAGINA.

Seriously, people.  Get over it.

Why is the word “vagina” so hard for people to deal with?  What’s so threatening about it?  Why does American television insist on treating it like a profanity?  Network television doesn’t mind using sex to sell their mass-produced shite that nobody needs; but they certainly won’t have us talking about it.  It’s as though we discovered the Wizard of Oz’s name was Bill, and forever after the name “Bill” became — well, as taboo as the word VAGINA.

Some Europeans hold the admittedly ridiculous view that all Americans are puerile, right-wing, self-obsessed, sexually repressed nincompoops with no knowledge of geography.  When a network decides to pull a tampon advert for using the word “vagina”, you can almost understand why.

I was reading Richard Adams’ blog this morning, where he described a scenario in which an American network pulled a tampon advert by company Kotex in which they used the word “vagina”, presumably in reference to what women use tampons for.  Kotex changed the word “vagina” to the phrase “down there”, according to Adams, but this wasn’t sufficient apparently.  So, this is what they ended up with:

Admittedly, this is a brilliant advert — even if the area in question is conspicuously lacking.  But come on, America!  It’s a fucking vagina, more than half the world has one!

For shame, for shame.

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Filed under gender

This Week: Top Five Alternative Albums of the 1990s

by Ben Kritikos

Let me start by saying that listing the top five of anything is completely arbitrary. There is no point. For every one thing I list as “top” there are thirty others you could reasonably argue are better. But whoa there! Go make your own list. This is creative solipsism here.

Everything about lists is dodgy; it brings to mind the sinister, the cold, the calculated. And what’s with “alternative”, eh? What the hell does “alternative” even mean? I think, when I was a teenager, it meant: an alternative to pop-rock. Of course, there’s no alternative to the corporate media anymore. Osama bin Laden probably uses facebook. Sarah Palin and Nick Griffin are the new “alternative” — but instead of killing themselves with drugs or guns, they kill children with their minds.

Not really. But they would, I imagine. Or they’d remove their human-like exteriors to reveal their true Slitheen identity, and eat children alive while drilling oil pits into baby polar bears’ faces, and shooting black people into space. 

(Click on the title to see all seven pages of this blog.)

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Filed under Music, Top Fives

Welcome..

Hello! Welcome to our blog. There will be loads of interesting creative fodder up here soon, but for now you’ll just have to listen to the what might be the best Smiths cover you’ll hear all day:
http://thickerandthinner.podomatic.com/entry/2009-11-30T13_01_44-08_00

Thank you.

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